Section 0: Background
Hi everyone! I’m trying to tailor this a bit more to reflect the UK Money Diary style where I give context on the week before and reflect on it after. I also added in some of the questions from the recent thread about what Refinery29 should ask diarists (see here).
I wrote this the week of Thanksgiving; my partner and I stayed in NYC instead of going home to either of our parents’ homes. We wear masks and stay socially distant when we leave the house. I’m thankful that we live close to a park and live on a block where we know and enjoy talking to our neighbors.
This was a relatively normal week for us during a pandemic, save for me spending a bit more than normal and it being Thanksgiving. We’ve both lived in the city since college and have so-so relationships with our families, so we didn’t leave for “home” when the pandemic hit.
I also just named my boyfriend instead of giving him an initial. He’s the only person I actually saw this week, but the initials always throw me off when I read these.
What do money and success mean to you? What are your end goals?
It helps me to see money as a tool. I never resonate with people who say “money doesn’t buy happiness” because to a certain degree, it does. Money enables me to live the life I want.
I’m pursuing FIRE (financial independence, retire early) and hope to be financially independent (able to live off my investments) by my early 30s. To do so, I save 60%+ of my income per month. I want this because working for 40 years isn’t sustainable for me—I have a very cushy tech job and still get anxiety and rage about waking up every morning to work, the rat race, and being paid inequitably to male peers. I’d like to give myself the option to leave this world as soon as possible.
As an alternative, I could see myself successful if I open a product consultancy, where I advise early-stage startups on product management, what to build for their MVP, and product-market fit. I’m really interested in tech ethics and the questionable practices in venture capital, so I’d love to be in a place where I could be picky about what clients I take and help truly mission-driven businesses thrive. I could see this also working as a small business incubator—why not apply what works in startups to small businesses?
I don’t yet have a firm picture of what I’d like my life to look like when I retire. I’m interested in spending a lot of time reading, traveling to new places for extended periods of time, and potentially writing a book. I get extremely interested in niche topics. Right now if I had to guess, I’d be writing a book about the ways multi-level marketing companies (MLMs) manipulate women.
Are you a spender or a saver?
Definitely a saver. My partner is more of a spender, and we’ve influenced each other well. Seeing him spend money on himself for video games helps me realize I can spend more money on myself for things I just want (see my big purchase for myself this week).
In turn, seeing me save a lot of money has motivated him to up his 401k contribution and overall savings. He’s also interested in FIRE, although I’d say my timeline is more aggressive.
If you could go back in time, what's the one piece of financial advice you would give to your past self?
Learn about investing, look up the terms you don’t know, and start doing it as soon as possible. Ask questions to people you know or on the internet.
On to the diary!
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Section One: Assets and Debt
Investment Balance
$131,175

• Retirement (includes 2 company 401ks and 1 rollover IRA): $55,730
• Brokerage: $27,233
• Roth IRA: $25,439
• Managed account: $17,923
• HSA: $4,850

Equity if you're a homeowner
N/A, I rent in a HCOL city. No plans to own anytime soon
Savings account balance
$10,270
Checking account balance
$3,433 in checking account for bills

• This fluctuates, but I try to invest anything over $2k. I’m pretty conservative with my checking account buffer, and don’t worry much about the interest I’m “losing,” especially because interest rates are so low right now

$2,518 in checking account for rent

• I keep a holdover account that’s connected to Venmo and Zelle to pay rent

Credit card debt
N/A. There’s $1,348 currently on my credit cards, but I pay them all off in full each month. My parents signed me up for a credit card as soon as I was old enough and taught me about how important it was to pay in full. In fact, I think this was so hammered into my brain that doing anything other than that each month was never an option. Because of this, I’ve always thought of credit cards as similar to debit cards—only spend money you have.
Student loan debt (for what degree)
I was fortunate to go to college on a full scholarship, including living expenses. I studied psychology and sociology, and I graduated without any student loan debt.
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Section Two: Income
Main Job Monthly Take Home: $6,570/month
I maxed out my 401k early this year, so for 8 months I was contributing $2,500/month out of my paychecks. That ended in September, so it changed my monthly take-home from about $4,650 to $6,570/month.
Deductions:

• 401k: $0/month (was $2,500/month)
• Medical: $128/month
• Dental and vision: $11/month

Income Progression

• I started in customer support right out of college, making $40,000/year + overtime, which ended up being about $52,000/year (thanks OT!).
• About a year later, I moved into an entry-level product role at the same company and received a raise to $60,000/year.
• The next year, I moved to a new company for a half-step promotion where I was making $82,000/year + 15% yearly bonus. The bonus was dependable enough that it was assumed as part of our total compensation, so let’s call it $95,000/year.
• Early this year, I switched companies again (noticing a theme?) for a promotion and now make $122,000/year.

I don’t have any other sources of income outside my main job. My partner makes a similar amount to me—about $117,000/year with bonus.
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Section Three: Expenses
I live with my partner and we don’t have combined finances, but split many expenses 50/50. We use Splitwise to log transactions. He’s more laid-back about being paid back, but I’m much more “I don’t want to owe anyone anything, and I don’t want anyone to owe me anything” (I know, rigid, but I’m working on it!).
Splitwise is nice because it’d be ridiculous to Venmo request each other for a $4 coffee, but we can see how expenses are adding up. If someone has racked up a few hundred dollars of spending for both of us, the other person will cover our expenses for awhile. It works for us!
Rent
$2,200 for a 2 bed, 1 bath apartment in Brooklyn. We split rent 50/50.
Renters insurance
About $7/month for my portion. This covers all our possessions plus my boyfriend’s watches. He pays 75% of it because half of the monthly cost comes from the extra watch overage.
Savings contribution
I try to have about $10,000 sitting in my savings account at any given time, because it makes me feel safe in case of an emergency. I also like the freedom it enables, in case I wanted to leave my job and take a significant amount of time off. This is already at the $10k I want, so I don’t contribute to it monthly.
Investment contribution
It varies but on average I contribute $2,500/month to my brokerage account and Roth IRA (combined).
Donations
I try to donate about $200/month, but it’s pretty sporadic. This month I donated to the Yellowhammer Fund and Northwest Abortion Access Fund. One of my major goals for 2021 is to step up my donations and create an actual strategy around them, potentially involving a donor-advised fund.
Gas/electric
Our gas is $20-25/month and electric is $50/month. I pay gas and Will pays electric, both go in Splitwise. About $37/month total for me.
Wifi
Our wifi is $60/month, which goes into Splitwise—I pay $30/month.
Cellphone
I’m still on my parents’ phone plan—sheesh! This is convincing me that I should Venmo them for it each month.
Subscriptions
I pay for Hulu with ads, $5.99/month. My boyfriend pays for Netflix and we share a Spotify family plan with a couple of his friends, which I chip in $4/month for.
I also pay for the budgeting software YNAB (You Need a Budget) which is $84/year. I only pay it once a year in September.
Medical
I recently had to go to the emergency room for an overnight stay and follow up with some specialists. (I’m okay!) Because of that whole shindig I’m expecting to max out my deductible (and potentially my out-of-pocket-max) right at the end of the year. This will be about $4,000, but none of the claims have come through yet so I’m not sure of the exact total. I have a category in my budget for my deductible, and the rest will come out of my emergency fund.
Physical therapy
This month I’m starting pelvic floor physical therapy for dyspareunia (pain with intercourse).
I’d tried everything the internet suggested (“just relaaaaaax”) before getting the courage to find a new ob-gyn and ask her about it. She had some recommendations, but ultimately physical therapy was the “last resort” option that I’m now exploring.
My new physical therapist comes highly recommended but is out of network with insurance. Each session is $250, and I’ll go once every 2-3 weeks for the next few months as part of treatment. If you’ve worked through this problem (or are experiencing it now!) I’d love to hear your experience.
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Section Four: Additional Questions
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Absolutely. My dad was the first in his family to attend college and my parents made pretty calculated decisions about where they would live so I could go to the absolute best public school possible. Over 90% of students at my high school attend a 4-year college, and we start talking about it freshman year. To say college was encouraged in my environment is an understatement.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
My dad has worked in finance since I was about 10. He’s always been really knowledgeable about both higher-level economic concepts and the minutiae of personal finance. My family is frugal, too: we clipped coupons and got clothes on super-sale at Kohl’s and Goodwill. I know there was a period of time when he became self-employed and money got very tight for a few years, but the bulk of those worries were largely kept from me.
Did you worry about money growing up?
Yes. While we were comfortable, we lived in such an affluent place that our family was in “the middle class” of the town and it made me worry more about money than I probably needed to. Think The Stepford Wives for context.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
In college, I became maybe 80% financially independent as I had a scholarship and worked part-time during school and over the summer, but I was still on their insurance.
I remember being frustrated in college because even though I knew I was extremely privileged, my friends in college had their parents pay their summer apartment rent and gave them an “allowance” of spending money, and I was “limited” by the options I could afford with the job I had. My dad told me at the time, “This is frustrating but it’s preparing you for actually having to live off the money you make in the near future.” (Great, great advice Dad.)
I’m technically still financially dependent on my parents for my cell phone bill, but otherwise I pay for everything: rent, insurance, utilities, food, therapy, and all wants in the form of clothing, workout classes, etc. I could ask my parents for money if I absolutely needed to, but would use it as a last resort.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
I have an account (mentioned above) that a family friend who’s a hedge fund manager, well, manages. I believe the initial deposit was $1000 over 10 years ago, but that money wasn’t mine either, it’s all a gift. It’s not very liquid—it’d take me several months (and some very good reasoning) to get any of that money withdrawn, since it’s supposed to be for “the future” (which I guess I could argue is now?).
I might receive a small amount of money when my grandmother passes, but it’d probably be around $1-2k, if at all.
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Day 1 Wednesday, November 25, 2020
8:30am Wake up and shower, take my vitamin C gummies, then make coffee. I wasn’t much of a daily coffee drinker until my offices had it for free, and now I’m definitely addicted. I don’t really care if the coffee is shitty or not, I just put some milk in it and it’s great. Right now I’m trying to drink half or three-quarter cups so I can attempt to pull back my addiction a bit. I log onto work at 9am.
11:30am Eat leftovers from last night for lunch—quesadilla + Spanish rice. There’s an incredible Mexican restaurant by us, and now I am ruined for the tacos, quesadillas and nachos from any other place.
12:30pm Will picks me up in the U-Haul. We’re driving about 20 min away to pick up a butcher block desk he bought off Craigslist, which ends up being from a small office that’s downsizing. The desk is $150 which he pays for. We love the office’s style (and the owner is super nice!) and walk around while he shows us what else he’s trying to get rid of.
We end up buying an extra-large ZZ plant and two side tables from him for an extra $120, way less than we would have paid for the quality elsewhere. My half will be $60, and I’ll split the U-Haul too, $44.51. $82.26
2:45pm That ended up taking a lot longer than we expected! We get back and unload the van, then I bring stuff inside while Will returns the van to the U-Haul location. I jump back onto work—so much for a slow afternoon before Thanksgiving. AWS is down, which powers a lot of our engineering work (and a lot of the internet!) so a lot of our teams are basically twiddling their thumbs. We chat about how to message the outage to customers.
5:45pm Will starts making dinner (braised chicken and veggies) and I sit down to read with a strawberry Chobani, but I end up just reading Reddit and searching for new podcasts to listen to.
7:45pm Dinner was great! Now…ice cream.
9:43pm I remember that my mom sent me ideas for her and my dad’s Christmas presents, so I order on Etsy and Amazon. My dad gets a mug with an Ernest Hemingway quote (“write drunk, edit sober”) ($21.54) and a book on writing ($16.63), and my mom gets this food warming tote contraption she wanted ($43.52). We’ve been paring down Christmases over the years—this year I asked for the Europe version of Ticket to Ride. $81.69
11:15pm I finish up the first episode of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City with some white cheddar Cheez-Its to snack on. After, I start on the dishes from dinner. I listen to the Product Market Misfits podcast while I do dishes—the episode with Kristen Anderson from Catch is great, highly recommend if you’re tired of just hearing stories about stereotypical Silicon Valley tech companies.
Day 1 Total: $166.69
Day 2 Thursday, November 26, 2020
10am Wake up super late since I stayed up scrolling on my phone too late last night. We make coffee and set out for a long walk around 11:15am.
12:05pm At the end of our walk, we swing by our local liquor store and buy 4 bottles of wine (red, white, rose, champagne). Will pays, total is $63.15 for everything. We haven’t had wine in the apartment for ages and I’m excited to have some stocked up. $31.57
12:30pm Get back from the walk, shower, then turn on football. I actually don’t really care about any NFL teams (I like college football a lot more), but it’s such calming background noise for me that I find myself looking for games when I have downtime. We also recently found out that Will’s friends’ dog only has a few months to live, so we order some jerky treats and a squeaky toy for him. $14.07
2:30pm We head out to the restaurant we’re going to for Thanksgiving lunch, a local place a short walk from our apartment. They’re doing a prix fixe menu of the classics—turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, green beans, and a phenomenal tarte Tatin with ice cream for dessert.
We eat outside under heat lamps. It’s super cozy. With our bottle of wine and tip the total is $208 (I try to tip over and above the norm because it’s a pandemic and Thanksgiving). My half will be $104.
5:53pm Get back from the restaurant. We have a ton of leftovers which is awesome (I think it’s excessive frugality, but I almost expect to stretch takeout or restaurant meals into two meals). Exchange some texts with my friends about their socially-distant Thanksgiving celebrations.
I turn on the Washington vs. Cowboys game right at the halftime show, which is Kane Brown with the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders. They’re all wearing masks (except for Kane) and it’s so odd to see them dancing in masks. I mean, I’m glad they’re wearing them, but it just seems like we could have gone without the halftime show this year.
9:21pm I order contacts from Contacts Direct. I got a new prescription but didn’t have a great experience with the eye doctor, so I’m hesitant about this order—only ordered one box of 90 lenses for each eye instead of a year’s worth of lenses. I’ve been getting headaches pretty frequently, so I’m hoping getting a new pair of glasses and alternating those (instead of wearing my contacts for 16 hours a day, every day) will help. $29.98 after insurance benefits
Day 2 Total: $179.62
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Day 3 Friday, November 27
8:56am Wake up super last minute, run to sign onto Slack and then start grinding coffee beans. I’m online and drinking a big mug of coffee by 9:10. (So much for half cups.)
10:45am Come up for air from work and grab the stuff to make a bagel. Everything bagels and plain cream cheese are my go-to combo.
12:03pm I grab a bag of clothes to drop off at the donation bin and a couple library books to return. The library is about a 25 minute walk so it’ll be a nice lunch break diversion.
12:56pm After the library I stop by the grocery store for some paper towels and sponges, since we’re almost out. Total is $22.62, my half is $11.31
1:09pm When I get home I jump back into work and put the USA vs. Netherlands game on my second monitor. By the 75th minute, the US is up by 2 goals so they start putting in some younger players—it’s fun to see Midge Purce and Sophia Smith play! I also throw some bagel bites in the oven for a quick snack and promise myself dinner will be healthier.
4:23pm I zone out of work and start playing Among Us. I end up playing for over two hours. We open a bottle of wine at some point and I get super tipsy.
6:50pm Turn on the tail end of the Notre Dame vs. UNC game. It turns into Jeopardy, which turns into Wheel of Fortune, which I’m not mad about. P isn’t as into the game shows and leaves to microwave a plate of leftovers from Thanksgiving dinner and play video games.
8:40pm Finally getting hungry after my bagel bites and Cheez-Its this afternoon and make a plate of Thanksgiving leftovers—turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans and cauliflower. Yum.
Will and I end up getting in a tiff about the mess in our apartment so we take a break, cool down and talk it through. I watch a couple episodes of Sister Wives and go to bed around 1:30am.
Day 3 Total: $11.31
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Day 4 Saturday, November 28, 2020
10:05am I stayed up late (again) so it’s nice to sleep in. I play Among Us for awhile and have a couple rounds where I’m the impostor and get some great kills and wins. I run out into the living room and celebrate with Will. We laugh because it’s silly how much we love the games we play. Around 10:45 I start making coffee.
11am We desperately need new sheets because our fitted sheet has a huge hole at Will’s feet (and it’s growing). I search a women’s personal finance group I’m in on Facebook for recommendations and we end up buying a queen sheet set from Belk. Total was $100.71 with their sale. $50.35
1pm I was planning on returning a package to the post office today, but forget it closes at 1pm on Saturdays so I decide to run to Target instead. I have a lampshade to return and want to look for a shower caddy as well. I also have an old iPad to return, which Will tells me I can do at Best Buy. He finds an old iPod and flip phone I can take too.
Take the MTA there ($2.75 for a single fare). When I get there, it’s a madhouse and I remember that I have sillily (is this a word?) decided to come on the weekend of Black Friday. I stand in the returns line for about 15 minutes and get $10.89 back, but ditch the idea of trying to look for a shower caddy. The checkout line looks like 100 people long. -$8.14 because of return
Next I go to Best Buy, but who am I kidding—the line to get in the store is even longer than the Target checkout line. I walk back to the subway and get on to go home. $2.75
2:30pm Since Best Buy was a no go, I search for electronic recycling around me on the way home just to see where I could drop off the devices I have. Apparently there’s an EcoATM not too far from my subway stop. It’s more for selling devices, but if they can’t give you money for something, they’ll recycle it, which is exactly what I wanted. I put each of the pieces in the scanner, and end up getting a whopping $2 total (for Will’s old iPod). Still cool because I was just expecting to recycle it all. I’ll give Will the $2.
2:44pm There’s a Dunkin nearby so I pop in to grab a couple donuts ($2.90). There’s a woman outside asking for money, so I give her $5 cash. $7.90
3:00pm Last stop—our favorite deli is nearby and Will mentioned he wanted to get bacon there recently. I get a 1/2 lb and salivate on the way home. This is one of those things I won’t put in Splitwise because it’s small and because it’s fun to get for P as a tiny little present. $3.50
3:45pm Once I’m home I’m super hungry from only eating carbs all morning so I have a snack of carrots, hummus and some pepperoni. I head back out to drop off a bag of clothes and shoes at a drop box a few blocks away. The neighbors are outside at the park near our house so I stop and chat with them for a few minutes. Their kids are the cutest.
6:47pm For dinner I make a ham and cheese sandwich (panini style with rosemary butter) and more carrots and hummus. I put on another episode of Sister Wives. These people are so fascinating to me—first off, I think the husband is completely full of himself. But I’m also so curious about the wives. There are a lot of talking head testimonials where the parents explain that they’re “oppressed” because they’re different and want to go public so the world can see polygamy as a valid family style (I’m only on season 2).
I know they’re probably playing up the “we love our other sister wives and have so much fun together even without Kody” aspect because people expect sister wives to be catty and hate each other, but I can’t help but wonder why they need to be in plural marriage to get the same friendship they seem to value so much. I also doubt they’d extend the same grace and tolerance they want to people who are “different” because they’re LGBTQ, or “different” because they’re in an open relationship or marriage.
9:15pm I mix together oatmeal chocolate chip cookie batter and put some cookies in the oven. While I’m waiting, I browse Zocdoc for well-reviewed providers—I want to make a podiatrist appointment for a lingering toe issue and an audiologist appointment for a routine hearing screening. I got the idea to make these appointments since I’ll hit my out-of-pocket max with the hospital visit, making them free or very discounted. I make two appointments for next week.
I also lust over a Farm Rio puffer jacket that feels overpriced but I just love. Maybe I’ll buy it tomorrow since they’re having a 30% off sale.
Day 4 Total: $64.50
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Day 5 Sunday, November 29
8:58am Wake up and switch between scrolling on Reddit and playing a few Among Us games. After a bit Will gets out of bed and makes coffee for us.
9:45am Will finishes the movie he started last night and we start on breakfast. We’re making the bacon I bought yesterday, breakfast potatoes with onions, and a fried egg for Will (I can’t stand the taste or smell).
11:00am Yum! Breakfast was great. I watch a couple episodes of Sister Wives and mull over buying that ridiculous but amazing puffer jacket from Farm Rio. I’ve still been thinking about it since last night and I might take the plunge.
1:25pm I get a jolt of motivation to work out and do a 20 minute Sydney Cummings video on Youtube. I heard about it from a recent Money Diary posted here! After it’s done I’m so, so tired. I stretch and unpause my episode of Sister Wives.
2:22pm I help Will move the butcher block slab for his desk out to our backyard. We live on the first floor of a single-family home that was converted into apartments, so we get the backyard too—it’s awesome to have outdoor space in the city. P works on sanding it and applying poly for the next couple hours.
5:07pm Will suggests pizza for dinner and I am always, always down for pizza. I order pickup from the spot down the street—one grandma, one cheese and 2 orders of garlic knots come to $38.60. We’ll have leftovers for tomorrow too. $19.30
5:50pm We pick up the pizza and dig in. While we’re eating we turn on the Chiefs vs. Buccaneers game; Will has a few players on his fantasy team in this game.
6:57pm I sign up to write letters to Georgia residents encouraging them to vote in the Senate runoff elections in January. This is through Vote Forward—I did 20 letters for the general election in November and want to participate again. I’ll print the letters at a local coffee shop since we don’t have a printer at home.
Will sends me this Reddit comment about campaign finance since we’ve been talking about it recently. I decide I’m convinced by the argument and set up a $5 monthly donation to Brand New Congress. $5
8:19pm After texting back and forth with my friend all day, I buy the puffer jacket—so excited. She encouraged me to get it and is pumped for me too. $228.64
I also notice my paycheck has started processing in my checking account (I get paid tomorrow), so I enter the amount in YNAB and budget it all. I earmark about $1500 to go into my brokerage account tomorrow. I won’t include it here as “spending” since it’s included in the overview section above.
Day 5 Total: $252.94
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Day 6 Monday, November 30
8:43am Wake up and turn on my Slack. Will started the coffee process and I finish it up by pouring the water into our Chemex and letting it steep (I know there’s a coffee-centric word for this...).
8:56am I check my Citi card and my YouTube TV trial rolled over—I was going to cancel it this morning, which I thought was the last day. I email support to see if they’ll refund me, because (I promise I’m not just saying this!) I did have a pretty bad experience. The Roku app was glitchy for us every time we watched something. Maybe they’ll feel nice today! $64.99
9:35am After responding to a few work messages, I run out the door to the post office to avoid a long package line. I did the Warby Parker 5-day home try on and have to return my box of glasses today. I found a pair I really like and am excited to get in the habit of wearing glasses again, instead of just my contacts.
Thankfully the line is only a few people long. The employees are also super nice every time I go, so I try to be really pleasant too. The lines are usually long and I’ve seen more than one adult have a fit at this post office. It’s rainy today and I couldn’t find our umbrella, so my flimsy rain jacket gets pretty soaked through on the walk back.
11:35am My podiatrist appointment is supposed to be tomorrow morning, and they call me to tell me since I haven’t hit my deductible, I’ll have to pay out of pocket for the visit. I explain that I’m 100% going to hit my deductible, the claims from the hospital just haven’t processed yet. I ask her to bill my insurance first for the visit, then I can pay whatever ends up not being covered (if anything). She agrees!
Maybe this is standard, but I’ve never had it happen before—even if I haven’t hit my deductible, I’ve always been to offices that bill insurance first, then I pay the remaining balance.
1:05pm Lots of meetings today. I break for lunch and heat up the braised chicken with veggies. It’s definitely on its last good day, so I’m glad I used it up. Still yummy!
2:20pm Woohoo! Get an email that my YouTube TV charge was refunded. -$64.99
Will ran to Home Depot today to buy some tools for his desk and also got a shower curtain liner since ours is ripping. I go to put it up in the bathroom but my arms are so sore—like I got my flu shot type of sore.
5:05pm Sign off work after trying to wrangle a supremely frustrating SQL query. I don’t get it but figure I can ask our analyst team for help tomorrow. Will will have a late night working, so pizza and Sister Wives is in my near future.
While watching, I update YNAB to reflect the end-of-month balances for my investment accounts. I get a huge dopamine hit by seeing my net worth number go up. I’m also anticipating it going down a bit next month because of my medical bills, so I relish the moment.
8:09pm It suddenly dawns on me that my arms are sore because I worked out yesterday. It’s so rare now that I literally forget when I do it. Ha!
9:15pm We watch the Eagles vs. Seahawks game and I absentmindedly play Among Us. I end up getting ...bullied by a person playing it? They get mad that I figured out they were the imposter and start saying all these schoolyard-type digs throughout the next couple rounds, but level 100 of cruel.
I’m embarrassed by how sad it makes me but think maybe it’s a good thing I don’t immediately know what to say to bully people back. Such a weird experience. I end up going to bed around 11:30.
Day 6 Total: $0
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Day 7 December 1, 2020
7:07am Wake up late for my alarm at 7. I’m up a lot earlier today because my podiatrist appointment is first thing. I get dressed in the dark, kiss P goodbye, grab my water bottle and run out the door to the subway by 7:30. $2.75
8:10am Get to my stop and swing by Starbucks before the appointment. I get a vanilla latte and the bacon cheddar and egg sandwich. Total is around $10 but I have a gift card loaded onto my Starbucks app.
My spending here went way down when I switched jobs to an office not close to a Starbucks, and then stopped going into an office at all.
8:30am My appointment goes great, if a little painful when she numbs my toe. I had to get an ingrown toenail removed. I danced ballet and pointe for years so I’m (unfortunately) used to them, but this one was terrible. The doctor and I bond over both being dancers with bad feet and they schedule me for a follow up two weeks out.
She actually says there’s been a rise in these procedures because people aren’t getting pedicures since the pandemic and aren’t cutting their toenails well! Wild.
I look silly on the subway in December wearing Birkenstocks and socks with a huge toe bandage. It looks like one of those cartoon characters who stubs their toe and it becomes 10x bigger than their other toes. $2.75
9:40am I get off at the stop before mine to stop at Rite Aid. I grab Neosporin, band-aids and epsom salt and check my notes for anything else she mentioned about caring for my toe. $12.97
10:00am When I get home, I hop into work and working with our engineers on a promotion for the New Year. I also catch up with Will since he stayed up late last night and I got up early for my appointment. He says he ended up staying up until 3:30am (!!) cleaning up his tools, working on his desk and putting up the shower curtain. I’m floored that he is functional right now after waking up at 8.
12:15pm Heat up the last of the pizza for lunch, along with hummus and carrots.
5:20pm Work is average-paced for the rest of the day. Not doing nothing, not totally over my head. Will puts in potatoes for baked potatoes to have later, which we’ll pair with a salad. We’re getting close to needing a grocery run again, so the meals are becoming more of a mishmash.
We listed a couple things on our local Buy Nothing group last week, so a woman comes by to pick up a wifi router we can’t use anymore. Would totally recommend looking up if there’s a group in your area—they’re usually on Facebook.
6:30pm After dinner I watch more Sister Wives and look up RIP Medical Debt, a nonprofit one of my friends shared for Giving Tuesday. They buy unpaid medical debt from collections, so $1 ends up paying off $100 of someone’s medical debt. I give $50 to the Arkansas campaign, which will clear $5,000 of medical debt.
As Will said earlier today, “medical billing in America is a racket” so I really hope this helps clear a burden from an individual or family. Doing this reminds me to check my insurance portal, which is steadily going up as each separate claim comes in. Ahhhh, modern healthcare! $51.49
At the end of each day please tally up your daily expenses. Then at the end of your diary please tally up all expenses in the following categories:
Total: $719.33

• Grocery + Dining Out: $157.77
• Fun + Entertainment: $0
• Home + Health: $164.67
• Clothes + Beauty: $228.64
• Transportation: $11.00
• Gifts + Giving: $157.25

​
Reflection This week felt like a big spending week for me. I checked YNAB and since January, I’ve spent about $1600 per month, not including rent—so about $400/week. That’s why this week’s $719 feels so high!
Writing this diary helped me understand how many things I have going for me. I’ve recently been in a huge funk—about my health, my performance at work and my relationships with family, friends and P. Going to the hospital, needing physical therapy to have sex and being in a pandemic will do that to you.
I was able to zoom out a bit and understand how stable and gratifying my life is. That being said, I’m so glad this community exists. I really love it and learning about all your spending and saving habits. Thanks for being here and sharing :)

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4/20/2020: I'm trying to keep this post updated, and trying to keep up with questions. Thanks everyone for helping answer questions in this post! Go team tax!
Stimulus Payment = Economic Impact Payment = EIP = Advanced 2020 Recovery Rebate

• Get My Payment and Non-Filer's Application are available at IRS.gov/EIP. Not sure which one to use? Here's a chart provided by the IRS.
• Having problems using Get My Payment? Here's the IRS Get My Payment FAQs.
• Check out the Economic Impact Payment Information Center for some Q&As about eligibility.
• Recipients of VA Benefits have been added to the list of people who do not need to file a tax return to receive automatic payments. Timing to be determined. IRS News Release 4/17/2020
• As a reminder, check IRS.gov/coronavirus for official IRS updates.
• Please do not call the IRS asking about stimulus payments aka Economic Impact Payments (EIPs). Nobody is there to answer the phone right now. There will be a special phone number available for EIP-specific questions; I will post that when it's available.

4/16/2020: There are a lot of issues with Get My Payment. If you are getting error messages, there are quite a few reasons why that's happening and the IRS is working to fix them. Here's an article from Washington Post that I'll try to excerpt below: Glitches prevent $1,200 stimulus checks from reaching millions of Americans.
4/15/2020 (afternoon PDT): Economic Impact Payment Information Center has been updated with some FAQs for the Get My Payment application, including error messages and questions about Direct Deposits. Get My Payment FAQs are now on a separate page (Updated 4/17/2020).
Also if the IRS attempted to direct deposit your payment to a closed account, then there's no option to update the bank account information. You will receive a paper check in the mail to the address the IRS has on file for you (usually the address on your last tax return unless you updated it).
The IRS clarified today that SSI recipients DO NOT NEED TO FILE a simple tax return unless they need to add qualifying children dependents. Automatic stimulus payments should be sent out by early May.
4/15/2020 (morning PDT): Get My Payment is now live, but you may have to wait a few minutes to get through. Also a lot of people are getting error messages - not sure if this is due to server overload or personal information not matching. My suggestion is you try again tomorrow.
To begin, you need your Social Security Number, Date of Birth, and Address and Zip Code from your most recently filed tax return.
If you get through and need to add your bank account information, you'll need your Adjusted Gross Income from your most recently filed tax return (Line 8b for 2019, Line 7 for 2018), the refund or amount owed from your latest filed tax return, and Bank account type, account and routing numbers.
See also this News Release: Treasury, IRS unveil online application to help with Economic Impact Payments; Get My Payment allows people to provide direct deposit information and gives payment date
Some issues noted:

• Make sure you type the address exactly as it appeared on your most recently filed tax return, either 2019 or 2018. If that doesn't work, try spelling out abbreviations, like "Street" instead of St.
• You may get timed out, or if you make three attempts that don't match you will have to wait until the next day to try again. Get My Payment is updated once daily, usually overnight, according to the IRS News Release.
• People who did not owe taxes or have a refund on their most recently filed tax returns are not able to get through the verification process. I believe this will affect everyone who filed a Stimulus-Only or Non-Filer tax return, either through the IRS or another tax software provider. (Added 4/17/2020)
• As suspected, there does not appear to be any way to update your direct deposit information if the IRS already sent a DD payment to you. If it was sent to a closed account, you most likely will have to wait 4-5 weeks for a paper check (if the timing is the same for a rejected tax refund). Update: This is addressed in the expanded FAQ in Economic Impact Payment Information Center.
• If you owed money for 2019 or 2018, it sounds like you need to enter your bank account information even if you already entered it to pay your taxes when you filed. Some people with this issue are receiving error messages for some reason.
• You should receive a notice in the mail within 2-3 weeks after your payment is sent. Save the notice for your 2020 tax return. There should also be contact information on this notice that you can call if you didn't receive your Economic Impact Payment (EIP) or if your EIP was not the amount you were expecting.

4/14/2020: IRS started sending payments out Saturday 4/11/2020. Many people should see the payments tomorrow in their bank account. A couple of things:

• Some people are not getting the full amount they were expecting. Why? Not clear - however within a couple of weeks you should receive a letter in the mail from the IRS. "The letter will provide information on how the payment was made and how to report any failure to receive the payment." - See the IRS EIP Info Center. You can try calling your Congress Representative's office if you are experiencing a financial hardship, but I don't believe the Taxpayer Advocate Service can help with EIP issues.
• Some people are reporting getting EIPs while their 2019 tax return is still processing. Good news! As a reminder, if you are experiencing a financial hardship because your regular tax return is still processing and you need your refund ASAP, contact your local Taxpayer Advocate Service and also call your Congress Representative's office.
• Still waiting to see what options will be available with the IRS Get My Payment application, expected April 17th.

4/10/2020:

• First payments anticipated to be sent Direct Deposit starting week of April 13th - IRS News Release
• Checks anticipated to be mailed starting April 24th starting with lowest-income taxpayers - Washington Post story
• IRS Non-Filers application available now - use this if you weren’t required to file a 2018 or 2019 federal income tax return and did not file a tax return for either year. FreeTaxUSA also has a Stimulus-Only Return option.
  • Social Security Retirement, SSDI, and Railroad Retirement and Survivor Benefits recipients do not need to use this application unless they want to include a qualifying dependent under the age of 17. Added 4/15/2020 - SSI recipients & VA beneficiaries are now included in the automatic payment group, but should still use the Non-Filer application to add qualifying children dependents.
  • Not sure if you have a filing requirement? See Do I need to file a tax return?
• IRS said yesterday they are currently unable to process individual paper tax returns. If you cannot e-file a return then you will likely be waiting a few months for a paper tax return to be processed. This includes amended returns.
• If your 2019 tax return is still processing for any reason, it sounds like you probably won't receive the stimulus payment until that return is finished processing. It's likely going to be awhile, sorry.
• I edited the post to try to make it easier to read. Nothing really new to update though.

IRS Links

• Economic Impact Payments site - Non-Filers & Get My Payment applications; added 4/10/2020
• Economic Impact Payment Information Center - added 4/8/2020
• Economic impact payments: What you need to know - Updated 4/2/2020

IMPORTANT NOTE: Stimulus payments will be available for the rest of 2020. It sounds like you do not need to wait until next year if you miss the first round of stimulus payments.
Update: File no later than October 15, 2020 to make sure you receive a stimulus payment this year, according to the IRS. (Revenue Procedure 2020-28)
NOTE that your tax return needs to be processed before you'll receive the payment. Normal processing time for an e-filed tax return is 2 - 3 weeks but if your identity or wage information needs to be verified it might take much longer.
We now return to the original post with updates:
The CARES Act (H.R. 748) has now been passed by Congress and signed by the President. Here are some Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) and answers that I believe to be true based on the text of the bill, reliable news sources, and some educated guesses based on the stimulus payments sent out in 2008. Please let me know if I got anything wrong.
Link to section in the bill about 2020 Recovery Rebates (edited link 4/9/2020)
What is this?

• The stimulus payments are advanced tax credits being sent out. This is not a prepayment of your regular refund; it's an advance of a new tax credit created for this year. It is not taxable income. You do not need to adjust your paycheck withholding for this.
• The advance payments being sent out will be based on information from:
  • 2019 tax returns; or
  • 2018 tax returns if you didn't file in 2019; or
  • 2019 SSA-1099 & RRB-1099 information if you didn't file tax returns either year; or
  • Non-Filers can use the official IRS application (added 4/10/2020)
• It's likely if someone doesn't receive an advance payment now they will be able to claim the credit on their 2020 tax return as long as they are eligible for 2020. (Clarified 3/31/2020)
• It sounds like ADVANCE stimulus payments will continue to be sent out based on 2019 or 2018 tax returns filed throughout the rest of the year. See IRS News Release linked at the top of this post. (Clarified 3/31/2020)

How Much?

• Up to $1200 per adult and an additional amount up to $500 per qualifying child (a child under the age of 17 at the end of 2019).
• Parents of children born or adopted in 2020 should be eligible for the additional $500 qualifying child credit on their 2020 tax return, based on how the 2008 stimulus payments were structured.
• If you could have been claimed as a dependent for 2019, you are NOT ELIGIBLE at this time. See section below for more details about dependents.

Who will get the ADVANCE stimulus payments?

• Taxpayers who filed tax returns in 2019 and/or 2018 and meet the eligibility criteria, and/or who received Forms SSA-1099 or RRB-1099 for 2019. If you could have been claimed as a dependent for 2018 and 2019, you are NOT ELIGIBLE at this time. See section below for more details about dependents. (Clarified 3/31/2020)
• Social Security retirement and disability recipients do not have to file a tax return to receive the stimulus payments. This applies to recipients of Forms SSA-1099 and RRB-1099. However you can use the IRS Non-Filers application to add a qualifying child dependent if you didn't include them on a recent tax return. (Updated 4/10/2020)
• Everyone else who does not have a filing requirement should use the IRS Non-Filers application to register for the stimulus payment.
• It sounds like stimulus payments will continue to be sent out based on 2019 or 2018 tax returns filed throughout the rest of the year. See IRS News Release linked at the top of this post. (Added 3/30/2020)
• If you didn't file 2018 or 2019 and you have a filing requirement, try to e-file your 2019 return ASAP using the IRS Free File program, MyFreeTaxes.com, or FreeTaxUSA.com. If you need assistance, try GetYourRefund.Org, a site where you can upload your information and IRS-Certified volunteers help prepare your taxes. (Clarified 4/9/2020)
• If you just e-filed or mailed in a 2018 or 2019 tax return, you should receive your stimulus payment that you are eligible for once that return is processed. (Added 3/31/2020)

Who is eligible?

• US Taxpayers with valid Social Security numbers with Adjusted Gross Income (AGI) below amounts specified in the bill, including US Taxpayers living overseas. See AGI amounts below.
• Anyone who qualified as a dependent for 2019 is NOT ELIGIBLE for the advance payments. More information below.
• If you are eligible but haven't filed a tax return for 2018 or 2019, you need to submit a 2019 tax return or use the IRS Non-Filers application to get an advance payment this year unless you received a SSA-1099 or RRB-1099 for 2019. (Updated 4/10/2020)

When will payments be sent out?

• Direct deposit payments will begin April 9th week of April 13th? IRS News Release 4/10/2020
• Paper checks will be mailed starting April 24th. Current plan is to send weekly batches starting with lowest AGI first according to WaPo:
  • AGI under $10,000 starting April 24
  • AGI under $20,000 starting May 1
  • AGI under $30,000 starting May 8
  • AGI under $40,000 starting May 15
  • Every week add $10,000 to AGI threshold
  • September 11, 2020 is est. date for paper checks to be sent to people who did not have tax information on file earlier and/or who need to apply for checks. (Added 4/3/2020)
• Just to compare, in 2008 it took about 8 weeks for taxpayers to receive stimulus payments. Taxpayers with accurate direct deposit information on file should receive payments first; it most likely will take 4-5 weeks after that for paper checks to be mailed out. Waiting for official IRS statement on timelines. (Added 3/30/2020)

What AGI Qualifies?

• Married Filing Joint (MFJ) taxpayers: Adjusted Gross Income (AGI) up to $150,000
• Head of Household (HOH) taxpayers: AGI up to $112,500
• Single / Married Filing Separately (MFS) taxpayers: AGI up to $75,000
• UNCLEAR: What about Qualified Widow(er) Filing Status? Probably same as MFJ?

What is the Phaseout Range for AGI?
For those of you who want to calculate it, the phaseout is 5% by the amount you income is over the AGI limits above. The phaseout range grows by $10,000 per qualifying child. There are also online stimulus check calculators.

• MFJ AGI $150,001 – $198,000 (with no qualifying children under age 17)
• MFJ AGI $150,001 – $208,000 (with one qualifying child)
• HOH AGI $112,501 – $136,500 (with no qualifying children under age 17)
• HOH AGI $112,501 – $146,500 (with one qualifying child)
• Single / MFS AGI $75,001 – $99,000 (with no qualifying children under age 17)
• Single / MFS AGI $75,001 – $109,000 (with one qualifying child)

What if I had a baby / adopted a child this year?

• You won't receive any stimulus for your child now, but you should be able to claim an additional $500 credit on your 2020 tax return. (Updated 4/10/2020)

What if I alternate custody of my child with another person every year?

• UNCLEAR. It's likely the parent/taxpayer who claimed the child and filed a tax return for 2019 will receive the $500; if nobody claimed the child yet for 2019, the taxpayer who claimed them in 2018 will likely receive the $500. I believe the credit will be limited to $500 total per qualifying child, based on the precedent of "no double-dipping." (Clarified 3/31/2020)

Who is NOT eligible at all?

• Anyone who COULD be claimed as a dependent for the tax years in question (see Overview of the Rules for Claiming a Dependent and Worksheet for Determining Support) even if you weren't actually claimed by another taxpayer.
• Anyone who doesn't have a valid Social Security Number (SSN)
• You filed Form 1040-NR or Form 1040NR-EZ, Form 1040-PR or Form 1040-SS for 2019. (Added 4/8/2020 from IRS information)
• Nonresident aliens (UNCLEAR as of 4/2/2020)
• DACA Recipients without SSNs (UNCLEAR as of 4/2/2020)
• Undocumented immigrants
• Anyone with an ITIN instead of SSN, unless their spouse is a current member of the Armed Forces
• Estates and Trusts

What if I was claimed as a dependent for 2018 & 2019 but I will not be a dependent for 2020?

• You should be eligible for a tax credit on your 2020 tax return. (Edited 3/31/2020)

Should I amend my 2019 tax return to say I was not a dependent?

• First, MAKE SURE YOU DID NOT QUALIFY TO BE CLAIMED AS A DEPENDENT in 2019. You can qualify to be claimed as a dependent at ANY AGE if you did not pay more than 1/2 your basic living expenses yourself. Also note that it does not matter if anyone claimed you; it's whether COULD be claimed by another taxpayer. See Overview of the Rules for Claiming a Dependent and Worksheet for Determining Support for more details.
• Second, are you sure you didn't qualify to be claimed as a dependent for 2019 based on IRS guidelines? Filing a fraudulent tax return just to get the stimulus payment is probably going to result in you having to repay the stimulus payment plus penalties and interest.
• Third, amended tax returns have to be mailed to the IRS. They usually take about 4 months to be processed, but IRS is currently unable to process individual paper tax returns. Once the amended return is processed you should receive a stimulus payment but it could take months. (Updated 4/10/2020)

What if I didn’t file tax returns for either years?

• If you have a filing requirement, e-file your 2019 tax return if you have everything you need to file a complete & correct tax return. E-filed tax returns usually take about 2-3 weeks to be processed; once your tax return is processed, you should receive an stimulus payment. (Clarified 4/1/2020)
• If you did not have a filing requirement, use the IRS Non-Filers application. Not necessary if you received a SSA-1099 or RRB-1099 for 2019 unless you want to add a qualifying child dependent.
• HOW TO FILE a tax return: Try IRS Free File options first; if you don't qualify based on income, try FreeTaxUSA. If you need assistance, try GetYourRefund.Org, a site where you can upload your information and IRS-Certified volunteers help prepare your taxes. Your 2019 income needs to be less than $66,000. (Edited 4/1/2020)
• 2018 can be e-filed if you go through a tax professional with that capability. If you usually file on your own, FreeTaxUSA is probably your best bet but that tax return will need to be printed out and mailed to the IRS. Processing times for paper tax returns are normally 3 – 4 months but the IRS is not processing individual paper tax returns as of April 9th. (Updated 4/10/2020)

What if I didn't have taxable income for 2019?

• Use the IRS Non-Filers application unless:
  • You received a 1095-A and/or subsidy for health insurance through the marketplace. You have a filing requirement.
  • You worked under the table and/or did some random jobs paid in cash; if your income was at least $400 in 2019 you have a filing requirement. This is reported as Self-Employment income - you can use any of the options on the IRS Free File site to report this.

What if I need to update my mailing address and/or direct deposit information with the IRS? Please DO NOT CALL the IRS at this time.

• You can file Form 8822 to update your mailing address with the IRS.
• Website for taxpayers to add direct deposit information estimated to be available by April 17th. IRS News Release 4/10/2020

To help everyone check on the status of their payments, the IRS is building a second new tool expected to be available for use by April 17. Get My Payment will provide people with the status of their payment, including the date their payment is scheduled to be deposited into their bank account or mailed to them.
An additional feature on Get My Payment will allow eligible people a chance to provide their bank account information so they can receive their payment more quickly rather than waiting for a paper check. This feature will be unavailable if the Economic Impact Payment has already been scheduled for delivery.

• NOTE: This does not say you can UPDATE your direct deposit information, only that you can ADD it if you didn't include it on your tax return.
• If you received your refund through a third-party processor like Santa Barbara Tax Products Group, had tax preparation fees deducted from your refund, and/or had your refund loaded onto a prepaid debit card please check with the company you used for more information.

What if I owe back taxes?

• You are in luck, this exception was included in the bill & you should still get a stimulus check. This applies to federal and state tax debts.

What if my student loan is in default?

• You are in luck, this exception was included in the bill & you should still get a stimulus check.

What if I owe unemployment compensation debt? (Added 3/28/2020)

• You are in luck, this exception was included in the bill & you should still get a stimulus check.

What if I owe child support?

• You are NOT in luck, any taxpayers with past due child support reported to the Treasury Department will not be receiving a stimulus check if the amount owed is larger than the stimulus payment. There may be relief for MFJ taxpayers who filed Form 8379 with their recent tax returns. https://www.irs.gov/forms-pubs/about-form-8379

What if I don’t get a stimulus payment and I really need the money? This SUCKS.

• That does suck, and the only advice I can give is to contact your senators and representative to let them know. In addition, there is expanded unemployment assistance available, including to people who normally don’t qualify like self-employed taxpayers.

What if I have other questions? Should I call the IRS?
Feel free to ask questions below, and/or check https://www.irs.gov/coronavirus, but DO NOT CALL the IRS at this time.
Some added FAQ:
What if I receive the stimulus payment but don't qualify for it?

• "Except in cases of fraud or reckless neglect" you shouldn't have to pay back any portion of the stimulus payment on your 2020 tax return if you don't qualify based on 2020 AGI. But if a taxpayer who should be claimed as a dependent files a 2019 tax return as independent in order to receive the stimulus payment - would they have to pay it back? Or only if they are a dependent in 2020?

Is this going to make my taxes go up, or my refund be less next year?

• NO, this payment is not taxable income, and it's not coming out of your regular tax refund. There will most likely be a worksheet on the 2020 tax return but you shouldn't have to pay back any of the stimulus payment "except in cases of fraud or reckless neglect" as written in the bill.

BONUS Historical IRS Links (added 3/31/2020)

• 2008 Economic Stimulus Payment Information Center
• 2008 Recovery Rebate Credit Information Center

Again, corrections / updates appreciated! Updated 4/20/2020